Seen and Not Heard?

My mother often reinforces how loquacious I was as a child by retelling a story about me at the age of three going into a retail store with her and pointing to a woman and yelling, “Mommy, why is that lady so fat?” I’m sure you’re cringing, I’m certain my mother still is, though she seems to get a modest amount of glee from telling the story.

My husband and I have grown up seeing too many painfully shy kids become so clingy, that we’re convinced that their social skills never quite catch up. You know them (come on, you know you do!), they’re the people you get stuck sitting next to on public transport and who immediately strike up an awkward conversation about their bunions.

We’ve made it a point to expose the kids to social interaction of many forms. Paul, surprisingly, is very committed to making sure that we have children that not only know how to talk to people, but that are fearless in social situations. Now, fortunately or unfortunately, if a stranger so much as makes eye contact with my two older children they’ll start telling charming stories about the color of their baby sibling’s bowel movement or start prattling on and on about the scab that they are picking and how they got it.

Now the twins are getting into the act. Imagine a night out having some pizza when my sideshow enters the restaurant. Try to eat a meal while a two-year old boy yells, “Hey! Heyyyyyy! Hiiiiiiiiiii! Hiiiiiiiii!” across the restaurant until you make eye contact with him and wave. Then, there’s Natalie, honest to a fault. We were once in Loews price comparing porch furniture when a salesperson walked up to us. “Can I help you?” she asked. “No, mommy only shops at Home Depot cause dad used to work there.” Maxwell is getting better at knowing when to speak in hushed tones. The other day we were at Target and a little boy was having a melt down in the toy aisle. Max waved me down to his level and said the following in my ear, “What a nightmare, right mom?”

Things sure have changed since the days of children being seen and not heard. I suppose I’ll take all of the awkward and slightly mortifying moments over my children never speaking up.